Saturday Sayings Special Edition-Quotes from the Next President

Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.

Community colleges play an important role in helping people transition between careers by providing the retooling they need to take on a new career.

Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because it's only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential.

-Barack Obama

Friday Favorites

Loves this song!

WTF?!?!!? Are you serious?

Affirmative Action-Necessary or Not?

This is an election year. 2008 is the year of the black man. Did he earn what he has using affirmative action?

No.

Did he earn it off of good looks? Money? Privilege?

No, No and No.

So the question is if a black man can accomplish running for President 40 years after the man with the dream was killed then is Affirmative Action really necessary?

From a Republican view absolutely and we must use Affirmative Action to refocus. We must teach from the African-American perspective. Once this happens we will be able to freely have conversations without feeling that there is a racial undertone. We will be able to listen to the other side's views and opinions of us without getting offended.

The second part of it denotes that we must refocus our energies on making sure the Black resources stay within the Black Community. We have to make sure that the children of the inner-city are as educated as their suburban counterparts.

If we do all this then Affirmative Action will no longer be necessary.

From a Democratic point of view Affirmative Action is and will be always be necessary because America is racist. That does not mean that a black man can't become president. Also we must note that it is easier for a white person with a record to get a job than a black man without one. Biased much?

I think so, what say you? Is Affirmative Action necessary or would our refocus on children and resources solve the problem?

Michelle Orphalee McMullen....Missing Person Alert

I Am Not My Sister's Keeper

SoOoOoO...Anyone out there ever dated someone then a close friend, sibling or cousin dates them?

I think that's a bit odd. I mean I would never want anyone whose been anywhere near my best friend's mouth ( I love you girl ) But still it's almost like incest.

Now, has anyone ever done it as a result of feeling that your mate was cheating so you try to corrupt their minds?

I was just thinking of it. After listening to the Gerald Levert "Eyes and Ears" I was like wow...Sean that's your brother's woman and you trying to get in it? Oh just to spite her.

And I'll knock your black ass out. Good Looking Out Gerald!


RIP Both of you.

Down Low Brothers and Their Affect On the Community

I have always known that gay black men were out there. I have always done my best to stay away from them but it's hard to do that when they seem to be everywhere. They seem to have varying ways of infiltrating all forms of society. Just yesterday I met two down low black men. Both of them told me that it appeared I would be comfortable with their behavior and bi-curious ways. The first one I quickly dismissed the second one I took the time to listen and I learned for one, there's nothing wrong with women, it's just like an itch or a need that they feel the need to pay attention. I wonder if there's a common link here. Is it that they feel a need to be dominated? Has society made these men feel as though they need to do more to feel love.

Furthermore, the bisexual thing is also catching me off guard. It's not enough to have a woman, but you also need a man AND some of them want these men to come into their marriages. Are you serious?!?!!?!? If my husband, boyfriend, friends with benefits, whatever told me that he wanted to bring another woman in my bed I'd raise an eyebrow, but another man!?!? And for his pleasure? Somebody definitely has lost their minds.

In this day and age of cheating, lying and broken marriages don't we already have enough to deal with...notwithstanding the high AIDS rates. No wonder HIV is running rampant through the black community from babies to teens to even grandmothers you would think we would all take better care, yet sadly many women are just so glad to have a man on their arm who pays the bills that they will accept this behavior. Absolutely appalling.

For a taste of exactly how men are getting away with this click here.

And do you all think about this? Is this a fad? Is it going to be the downfall of the black community?

Tell me your thoughts.

Yep...Serious.

Please go to www.myspace.com/donteacia....and hit Teacia up. She forgot to add her link in and I put it on the blog, but well...it's in moderation.

Please and Thank you.

Well, Well, Well

Ladies and Gentlemens...

I have been on a blog-cation. Welcome back to me!

Now after my blog-cation I went on a stress-cation.

The Hilton hotels are so nice. I'm in such a wonderful mood.

I just want to encourage you all to listen to a little song by T.I. It's called "You Can Have Whatever You Like" and it's going to corrupt women everywhere, because well...it's like a new theme song.


*singing* baby you can have whatever you like.....yep you can have whatever you like....

*still singing* now I ain't saying I'm a golddigger, but I ain't messing with no broke n*ggas...

A Little Something I'm Curiousu About....

Why do men rate chicks?

Earlier I heard I'm worthy of a banging solitaire while the chick sitting next to said dude is worth sucking his d!ck....

And the difference...I'm more mentally stimulating...how's that for mind candy?!??

Saturday Sayings

"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way."


"I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out."

"Laughter is the language of the soul."

-Pablo Neruda

Friday's Favorite Song

It's the way you walk and the way you talk...

And I must like it:)

September 11 Commemoration

I just wanted to be sure that today is not forgotten. We need to remember the lives that were lost during this sad event 7 years ago. Let us hold our heads high and continue the toward freedom and justice for all.

In perfect peace.

Sister 2 Sister

"Celebrate the truth of who you are. I think that's the long and the short of it. In any high visibility role, along with it comes so much stress and so much anxiety. You take on trying to fit into what you think other people think you should be or how they think you should look, that's too much stress, you know? Baby, you're trying to get your husband in the White House. You don't have time to be on no diet. Put on a Spanx and hit it! You don't have time for no foolishness. You have to walk in the truth of 'who you are' and celebrate that thing. There are so many other things that take precedence over that, you know what I mean? If you need to have a couple of sizes of dresses in the closet at the White House, then that's what you do. If today that size eight slips on real good and the next week you need to put on a size 10, then that's what you do."

-Niecy Nash to Michelle Obama

Interracial Dating

So I am having a discussion with two friends of mine about interracial dating...

My male friend says other guys are always asking him about how black women are.

My female friends says they are asking and then they want to try it out.

Let's do a little analysis.

Male point of view: He says that his other friends cannot find an attractive black chick to kick it with it. "Man, look...it's getting cold. Snowbunnies is bout to be out in this b*tch and I'm jumping on a white rabbit...but I love my coffee but I need to add some cream". Ok Eric, whatever you say.

Female point of view: "You know how I feel about this".-She only dates non-black men and I keep trying to tell her when you get through playing she will find an attractive, professional black man with that good wood. I ain't lying y'all she gonna do it.

Now for my own point of view: My first boyfriend was a wealthy white guy who gave me everything I could have dreamed and desired. EVERYTHING. If I lost it then he bought it again. Then when I got serious and got ready to start looking for husbands...they became chocolate, caramel, honey, whatever but black....yes indeed.

What say you good people? Is interracial dating cool or does it make you sick?

How to Make Love to a Black Woman

How do you make love, to a Black Woman?
How do you make love to a Black Woman,
Romantically and Patiently;
Take the time to make love to her mind.
Fulfill all of her midnight wishes.
Cover her entire body with soft wet kisses.
Tell her, so that she will know!
There's no place on her body
your tongue won't go.
And, when you love a Black Woman,
you love her real slow.

How do you make love, to a Black Woman?
How do you make love to a Black Woman,
Passionately and Sincerely;
Let her Sweetness become your Weakness.
Do not use just the Penis, But include your ear.
Listen to the sweet sound of her moans
and see what you hear.
Feel the warmth and care of her loving embrace.
Place your mouth on hers and savor the taste.

How do you make love, to a Black Woman?
How do you make love to a Black Woman,
Sensually and Honestly;
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Tell her that you love her,
more and more with each passing day.

Let all of the fantasies that dance in her head.
Become her moonlight reality
when it's time to go to bed.
Kiss and lick all over her body
until you find all her right spots.
Touch and caress her soft skin
and make her real hot.
Mutual satisfaction is a lover's plan.
Love her, cause you are in love with her.
She's your Woman and your her Man.

How do you make love, to a Black Woman?
How do you make love to a Black Woman,
Lovingly and completely;
Love her until her "Screams of Passion"
are all you that hear.
Suck on her neck and stick
your tongue in her ear.
Hold her soft round ass
in the palm of your hands.
Let her sexual wishes
become your loving commands.

Love your Black Woman with
your Mind, Body and Soul.
She's the most precious gift on this Earth.
She's worth her weight in gold.

How do you make love to a Black Woman?
There's only one true way to start.
To make love to a Black Woman,
Give her your heart

-Unknown

I absolutely agree...there's nothing more to be said.

Sigh

I just hadn't been able to think of anything to write about today. Oh well. Maybe later.

Saturday Sayings

I've got two daughters. 9 years old and 6 years old. I am going to teach them first of all about values and morals. But if they make a mistake, I don't want them punished with a baby.

-Barack Obama

Here's to You

This one's for the man who
is sweet but doesn't know he is.
makes you laugh without trying.
puts up with all your sh*t when he doesn't have to.
holds it all in.
holds you down.
makes everyday a little more interesting.
gives encouragement.
is grounded.
knows where he's been, where he is and where he's going.
knows when he messes up and fixes it.
would never hurt anyone on purpose.
is complicated, but likes the simple things.
is human.
ishose one of the best people you know (so far).

Thanks for simply being you.

And it's not even Black Man's Appreciation Day 2008

Favorite Song Fridays

Loves this. I might throw up a couple favorite songs a week since I have so many!


Enjoy your evenings!

-J

Why Can't A Woman Ask

I was having a discussion today with one of the best men I know. I randomly told him that I feel that black women in this generation are not as bad off as we think. In fact, we are not as scarred as we think. We have been one of the most privileged group of all time. For those of us who aren't we have taken that to shape us into better women.

Today's young black woman gets angry about lack of child support, men being dogs, etc. Yet, we are not realizing that we are strong enough to handle all of these things on our own. We are strong women whose mothers and grandmothers paved the way for us. Those women understood what it was like to have to walk in the back door, be stay at home moms and make it work off of $100 monthly if that. We really don't have it so bad, but if there is a problem we swear up and down that it's the black man's fault. And then, we will see one that we think is a good one we will damned near walk around the building because we know he's attractive but we don't wanna ask him out.

LADIES! You can walk right up to a man, introduce yourself and ask for his number. It's 2008. I think the men would appreciate it they have to deal with facing rejection far more than we ever have. Think about it, all you have to do is look half decent and you will get holla'ed at no matter what.

Think about it...you might find the man of your dreams this way.

No One is Writing Your Life

So, to those who actually know me you all know that I love to read. I will read anything, but I loooove black urban fiction. Yep-Carl Weber, Rochelle Alers, Zane...any of them I don't care as long as it's about black people.

This week I have already read two books and I think that black women reading these books is bringing about the demise of the black relationship. Yep! I said it and here's why:

As teenagers we treat relationships like they are fairy tales. We think everything should be roses, clouds and laughter. Then we hit the real world and we realize sometimes the sh*t just don't work. Sometimes she won't clean up or he won't bring his check home. So you got a dirty house, I look a mess and you're hungry. Ain't nobody happy.

So I was reading this book by Rochelle Alers where the woman says let's just be friends with benefits (do we ever say that?) and the man who after 35 years ain't loved nobody starts to love her. Now I predict women reading this damned book and thinking this will work for them.

NEWSFLASH!!!! You're f*cking over yourself.

Then I read Carl Weber's Married Men earlier in the summer. This woman told this man she wanted 80% of his income because of a picture (enhanced of course) which made it look as though he was cheating. It worked a minute. The judge wanted to say what the hell is wrong with both you (for fictitious effect it didn't happen). Ladies you cannot just demand a man give you all his damned money-it don't work like that. And if you do...in this day and age either you'll end up on Snapped or he'll end up on Forensic Files.

All I'm saying is it just doesn't work. Real relationships don't exist in the manner these do. There's not always going to be someone running down the street trying to get you to come back, sometimes they're just gonna let your ass leave and then pray you don't come back.

Just my opinion.

Girl, Gimme Dat...

So over over on SBM there's a commenter's discussion going on about what it takes to get a woman to give it up.

I was thinking to myself...what does it take for someone to get it...

Well I came up with just a few things for one, I like a man who touches me ALOT.

Then can I get someone who rubs me, bathes me, lotions me.

Treat me like I mean a little something to you and I'm all yours. And it's weird because it can 't just be anyone doing anything. It has to be the right man with that swagger, that confidence...that bomb sh*t. Yep I know some of the women know what I'm talking about.

So Hurricane Gustav battered the Southeast coasts today.

Luckily the hurricane didn't totally flood New Orleans, because I don't think the people there could have taken another Katrina incident.

Unfortunately, it's being followed by Hanna and Ike. Yep they're a-coming. Now I'm not sure about Hanna or Josephine but IKE!?!?!?

Due to the Ike Turner, I think we should change to Ismail...or something.

So that's all for now.

Exactly Why You Should Wait....

If you’re 13, 14, 15 and you have sex, this is not gourmet stuff. Nobody’s buying you a bottle of wine and candlelight and putting some romantic music on. No, you’re in the clothes closet or down near the dryer or dishwasher saying, ‘Hurry up before my mother comes home.’ That’s why you don’t know the boy’s name.
- Bill Cosby

Now I wasn't even really gonna say anything but when I read this quote...it just came to me. Somebody somewhere needs to do something. Young women are going to die and we're killing ourselves for love. Young women in this 13, 14, 15 year old category are going to die of HIV because they don't know any better. No one is teaching them to watch out for themselves, to have some self-esteem or to know their worth. Some of them have mothers and fathers in jail, while others have fathers who walked out or never knew they existed and still yet there are some with mothers who are tricking in the street because they never learned better.

It saddens me. While I am young, I know what it's like to be wined and dined. I know every man I've been with, what he does for a living and in some cases his Social Security Number. Yes, I've got it down to a fine art.

I digress.

Anyways...sometime I look at soon to be 14 year old cousin and I want to scream because I know I can stop her from having to face pain and heartache and she doesn't even know. Hell, I'm still swallowing those big girl pills. It's just so damned difficult. With an alarming rate of men going to jail, coming out with a trade and going back to his rural (non HIV educated) community and spreading himself around (because he can make money thus telling women no condom) we are rampantly being infected and bearing infected children.

What can be done about this problem? Does anyone think Obama, as the first black president, can try to band-aid the AIDS crisis in Black America?

Possession?

So I had a conversation with a friend and we discussed men and women and the different methods of hooking up....

Basically we decided men and women are different because if a woman initiates a no strings attached type thing...men will be cool with it, BUT if a man tries to do the same women will likely not accept it, because as soon as they display a "this can be my man" characteristic the jig is totally up. I thought about this and decided his was correct.

Then he related the strangest anecdote about a woman who made a marital comment during a sexual journey...ummm I need you to never do that. You will never get the d*ck again doing some stuff like that. That scares men and hell as a woman it scares me when men want me to tell them I love them during the act...SERIOUSLY?!?!!?!?? I don't think so. I don't want anything more than the vitamin D.

So my friend informed me that this is a tactic by men to possess the woman they are with. WTF? Am I a piece of property? But anyways, I digress....So apparently once you let a man tap that he thinks that it's his permanently.

So I thought about it then I realized this has happened to me. Yes, I was with someone who referred to me as his up until lately when he declared that he felt I no longer belonged to him. Well...ok...So now this has me thinking about the real dynamics of relationships between men and women and our fundamental differences....



To be continued....

Sol-Angel and the Hadley St. Dreams

Now I love me some Beyonce, but I have got to hand it to lil sis Solange. Girlfriend handled business on her newest CD.

I personally enjoy Valentine's Day and Cosmic Journey (ft. Bilal). Solange has enough dance, enough love and enough spunk all rolled into one.

Check it out on Tuesday!!!



If you can't wait, check it out here!

Happy Sunday!

What Does It Take?

"The chemist who can extract from his heart's elements, compassion, respect, longing, patience, regret, suprise, and forgiveness and compound them into one can create that one atom called love."

Kahlil Gibran, 1883

Chemistry-the interaction of one personality with another.
Chemistry-any or all of the elements which make up a certain compound.

A combination of many things can result in love. A combination of some of those things may result in lust, while others will result in friendship.

I recently read an article which detailed five specific types of chemistry. I wonder if anyone would agree with this:

1. Sexual chemistry-As I'm sure we all know and have felt this is the most common type of chemistry. Usually when you meet someone and you feel this type of chemistry you are trying to get out the club and back to this person's house. Yep-all you're thinking is let me get me get it on and that's all. Yes, you can feel this for multiple people at once and when you scratch the itch...it's like getting high, eventually you will want it again.

2. Comfortable chemistry-"I loved you gray sweatpants, no make-up...so perfect" John Mayer spoke some powerful words there. He loved that girl and he swore that they were so comfortable. She was everything that he would have wanted in a friend and as a result a lover. Yep, just because you have that comfort zone doesn't mean that there's no sexual chemistry coming.

3. Comedic chemistry-Girls just wanna have fun. So do guys. It'll help out later...trust me.

4.Complementary chemistry-All you do is laugh. Silliness is the order of the day when you two are together. This is usually found with someone who is complementary to you and not supplementary....like the quarterback who dates the nerdy girl. He feels smart and she feels beautiful.

5.We're just too alike chemistry-The person who matches you in everything. It's like having another you! Which works for well...predictability.

Try one or better yet, try them all and see how you get along!

Reciprocity

So this morning I had a very interesting conversation with a very interesting man.

He was pretty damned amazing on all levels: funny, smart, creative, etc. then we "discussed" a little mind sex. From this I told him he was so good at it I could have cooked him brunch right then. He replied that he'd "bust some suds". I was shocked because I am not used to a man wanting to this and he replied that it was a partnership and when you give help you get help. From an educated, black male I was not shocked. But I was grateful that I even ran across this person. This leads me to believe that there are good black men out there, if they have not been burned by some "buckethead" chick who really doesn't give a damned.

Now, this is not to say that a man should be a simp, however, if he is with a good woman who treats him as though he is a good man then he could act accordingly. Now these are just random thoughts, which should make a cohesive argument that black men and women can live together and raise families if we just had a little reciprocity.

Mind Sex...

"Mind sex...we ain't gotta take our clothes off yet, we can burn an incense and just chat..."

Excellent lyric. Anyways I have been meditating all week long on exactly what constitutes mind sex? I had a great conversation with a fabulous mind. It was so great, like damned near orgasmic. So I was thinking to myself, isn't mind sex the best form of foreplay out there? I certainly think so. If you can capture my intellect then there's a good chance you will be able to capture much more than that. Give me a good glass of wine, some relaxing music and a man with a soothing sexy voice and I am done for. Anyways, that's just my little thought-for the moment at least.

*This is dedicated to Mr. Love

Even I Don't Know

So, I've been missing in action because I met someone new and after the very first date I sort of moved in with him.

Sadly, it all comes to an end today and I don't even really wanna talk about it.

Moving on to other things, my best friend just sent me some pics of Britney Spears smoking a cigarette right next to her son Sean Preston as he so politely and childlike plays with the lighter and cigarettes.

This takes me to a flashback of when I was three. My parents were in the den and I was in their bedroom playing with the lighter which had a pretty palm tree on it and their Kool Filter Kings. Next thing they know their bedroom is on fire and their child is in the master bedroom on the other side of the item which is on fire. Yep. As usual here comes my dad with the S on his chest only to learn that I locked myself in the bathroom because I was scared that they would be angry with me. Yep that would be me: child full of mischief. Now Britney should know darn well that the courts just allowed her to have some rights to her kids though K. Fed has sole custody of the kids. Hmmm...I'm so not sure.

In other news, I was happy to visit the Essence website where Malinda Williams is chronicling her wedding planning. Check it out sometime at essence.typepad.com! I am so excited to check it out.

Moreover, about this new man in my life. He's fab. He's a little older than me and has some extra life experience which is always great. Likes R. Kelly, loves lazy nights in, movies, and let's me have bubble baths plus he makes me smile and laugh all the time.

Just a reminder for everyone to check out CNN's Black in America: Women and Children tomorrow night featuring Soledad O'Brien! It's supposed to provide an intimate look at being black in America so everyone will know what we go through on a daily basis I can't wait!

Strange time slot though, it's going against such black shows like Family Foreman, Run's House and Tyler Perry's House of Payne. I am excited to see all FOUR shows. I am going to catch everything and give a report.

The Road to Hell

Is paved with good intentions. Now I have a man whom I love more than anything. He is plagued with so many problems that it does not make sense. Is it fair? No. Definitely not because he's a good man. I love him, as Pablo Neruda would say, as certain dark things are to be loved between the shadows and the soul. Sometimes being with him and being without him is like being between a rock and a hard place. Sometimes it seems every time I open my mouth it is insulting to him. It hurts him. When he's like that I don't think he realizes that I am hurt too. He does not hear my heart when it cries out for him. Maybe he does I don't know. I want the absolute best for him. I always have. Somewhere in history I think we loved before. I was his queen and he was my king.

At this point, I am starting to think we have to go through the things. We've already been lovers and we were good at that. I was a good woman before him, a fabulous woman with him and now I still got his back and I'm learning to be his friend. Songs seem to fit my mood tonight.

Love is a part of our story.
Hate is a part of our story.
Making up. Breaking up.
It's all there.

We just have to learn to deal with it. I have told him before about my feelings. He knows how I feel...knows he's my heart. Understands my essence comes from him. He reads me as I do him and on some primal level we understand each other. Sometimes I feel that the love we have for one another is on such an odd plane that even we cannot comprehend it. It's that unselfish kind of love, the kind of love that makes you wanna do what is best for the other person, even though it is crushing you. It is putting up with their bullsh*t because you know they will put up with yours. Then, at the end of the day you can go to bed and wake up knowing that you've accomplished something you've made them feel loved. When they lay down at night they know you're gonna be there the next day. Sometimes they things you go through are little things. Things that you can move past that day. Sometimes it takes a week, sometimes a month. And like I said before, you don 't learn that someone loves you in between the sheets (or wherever you do things) but you learn it when you feel like you're in hell and that person is there with you. They don't leave you. They go with you. They take your pain and hold it in their hearts. The funny thing is you don't have to go out of your way to make them feel your pain. They feel it anyway. They see it on your face and they hear it in your voice. When they sleep, they sleep with your burdens and dream of a day when they can be fixed. I just don't know what to say other than the fact I am in love with someone whose mind is so burdened he sometimes feels like he can't go on. He loves me, I know that, but how can I go on everyday in happiness with a smile knowing he feels miserable?

I can't.
I have to.
It's hard.
I pray for perfect peace for both us.

-Peace Destroyed

I don't even know where to start...

I have so many things I want to blog about...every time I take a breath there's something else to blog about!

I guess I should start with where I left off yesterday...I ended mentioning Martin Luther King...but where I was going with that was the following:

People keep comparing Michelle Obama's class and style to Jackie O...Now I love me some Kennedy anything, BUT what about comparing her to the wonderful Coretta Scott King?

Here's a black woman who endured so much pain during her life because her husband was one of the front runners for the civil rights which so many of us take for granted today.

Well, here's what I think: if you are going to compare a strong black woman to anyone you should probably compare her to another strong black woman in history. Someone who, if she were alive, would rejoice in what is going on, who would give advice on everything from how to decorate the White House to fashion choices and even how to stand by him when he messes up (yep...Martin messed up). Kinda reminds me of what Jackie O did for Hillary as she moved into the White House in 1992. Someone tell me you can see the connection I am trying to make here. :) Anyways that's that.

Furthermore, I attended church last evening for Bible Study. I really enjoyed everything that the women's group discussed as well as the general Bible Study. It was my first time setting foot in the church and they were all so welcoming and nice. I learned that I must be obedient to God and his will. Also any trials and tribulations that we go through can come from many different places, we just have to be prepared for all of them. The pastor also said something which warmed my heart....he said many of us think someone loves us because of things that don't really matter. "You don't find love on a hot July night under the sheets, you find it when you go through things and that person stands by your side". He is absolutely right. I know for a fact that I found love when my health was not what it should have been. The love of my life stood by my side through my problems and I am going to stand by him during his regardless. That's what Coretta would have done. In fact, that's what she did. She stood by Martin no matter what he did. She stood by him no matter what things he might have done or been accused of. Yep-that's the kinda woman I'd like to be. I have to say it is difficult sometimes, because you want to put yourself behind them.

I don't know why I feel like that but I seem to always feel as though it is my job and duty to stand behind those I love. Even when it isn't easy. I agree when the going gets tough the tough get going. In my time being loved the way I should have been along I have been told so many things that I cannot believe. I have learned my worth. It is far more than that of diamonds or pearls. It cannot even be described. I think when you realize this, lose it and realize it again, then and only then are you well on your way to learning you...being flawed and trying to fix it.

So even when you totally mess up and hurt everyone around you, especially those you love the most you never, ever lose your sense of being a good woman. You learn that you are and trials will always happen you just have to know when to ask for help. In other words, know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em...and I can't even play poker ;)

-In Peace and Joy

Learning to Be You...

I recently read an article discussing Michelle Obama's experience as an undergrad at Princeton. The article details how her white roommate's mother was enraged at the thought of her daughter having to live with a black woman on a campus which up until very recently had been mostly segregated. But Michelle Obama never let that get her down. She has not visited Princeton's campus since she graduated and later went to Harvard to gain her law degree. But how do you separate yourself from the general racial views of your specific institution of higher learning?

First check out the article about Mrs. Obama.

Being that for the majority of my life I have attended predominantly Caucasian schools I can definitely attest to the each institution's need to help white students over blacks. I cannot think of more than two things put on a campus specifically for us and if it is there it is something we have to constantly fight for. Nothing is ever designed for us and our direct benefit.

Which brings to me to a situation currently happening at my institution. There is something there for the benefit of minority students. It has existed almost four years. It took twenty years to get it and now the administration wants to hide it. Hide it or hide the colored faces that peep at you from the full glass windows. Now...if the students take a stand..I mean really work toward getting it together and coming to the administrators and say we don't think this is right why ignore them? You get their tuition dollars too! Yet, if a white girl told you she did not feel comfortable with something you'd blanket the entire campus with it and make everyone feel that pain.

Let's not forget that in any given academic year how many racial incidents can happen. At this particular institution there have been numerous racially charged incidents. HUGE incidents...yet and still they still have no plans to stop these incidents. There was even an incident involving a benefactor for which they escorted him out, sent a ridiculous e-mail and that was that. Yet you want to get rid of something that benefits multi-racial and inter-cultural students? I think not.

Furthermore, we have always had to conform to what they think is the standard of beauty is. We have straightened our hairs, some have even bleached their skin, or slimmed the width of their noses. I saw we no longer have to do that. We can just wash and go...just as they do-straight, curly, kinked. Our skin is beautiful...cafe au lait, bronzed, chocolate, so dark almost purple does not matter. We're all beautiful. Just because we're not exactly what they want does not mean that we are not what we should be.

Everything has to be exactly as they think. Not until this year has a magazine devoted itself solely to black beauty. Italian Vogue is featuring all black models...what a blessing in 2008. Forty years after Dr. King's death...which brings to my next post...

-In Harmony

Mhm...

I am watching this play on BET right now. Now before people start tripping out on me their Sunday afternoon plays are often very good. It's about three couples and the men who just don't have their act together. Now a new man moves into the complex and manages to charm all the women making them all feel special in a very unique way. Now one of the women asked him he has a better half. And he tells her no, because the way he sees it a whole man deserves a whole woman. Because if you are a half and something happens to the other half then you become a quarter and in his mind there's not a whole lot a man can get for a quarter in this day and time. First off, I hope I got the math right and secondly I think he is right. As a woman, I don't mind being that complementary part but I don't know if I am going to sit there and be supplementary. I just don't think I want be a half. I wanna be a whole. I wanna be something so complete and fly on my own that when something is missing I can put my finger on it and I know, on my own, how to fix it. Now that said...I also want to be so whole on my own that when I need to give to that special man I can. I can give to him without it being taxing to me. If something is wrong with baby, then yeah something is wrong with me, but does that mean that I have to crawl up in a big ol' ball and cry? I don't think so. It means i have to stand firm and flat-footed. I will support him, but what I am not gonna do is be his momma and bandage all his boo-boos.

Now yesterday on a blog that I like I read this little thing about how to please a woman. Yes! You have to love her, wine her, dine her, excite her, you know like the Christmas Victoria's Secret commercials...give her everything she wants and nothing she needs. Now every now and then women need to feel like that. We need to feel like you give us what we need everyday, so then you give us what we want.

Finally I got a little question...is a good woman more like a house or a car...I'll answer that later or tomorrow.

What the hell is really going on?

Now in the past 24-36 hours, some very interesting things have gone down. Now for my own sake, safety and sanity let me run through them. First Hillary Clinton wins the Puerto Rico primary. Apparently all it really takes is a shot of tequila and some beer. (I think that came from MSN) Next, as I am sure everyone is aware the amount of delegates needed to win the nomination has gone from 2.025 to 2,118. At this point Obama is 46 delegates shy of the nomination while Clinton is 202. Tomorrow (June 3) will be the last two primaries: South Dakota and Montana where there are 48 delegates at stake. At this point we know that Obama has a larger following in these two places than Hillary Clinton. Obama also has more super-delegates than Hillary and he is expected to gain more as of tomorrow which further leads to the question of just why won't Hillary just drop out of the damned thing and let it go? On one hand her fate is pretty sealed, but there's the argument that some how, some way before the convention in August it will get better for her. http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/06/02/election.superdelegates/index.html
I don't know. However, I am starting to feel that perhaps the more we vote for and support Obama the more we are supporting McCain and his Republican cronies. This opens up a whole new can of worms for me, because I cannot for the love of God understand how George Bush could open his mouth and endorse anyone. That's about all he is good for I mean he is the LEAST efficient president EVER in my opinion. I really don't see where he is doing anything other than plundering the American economy and trying to play Captain Save a Country. As he does this Vice-President Dick Cheney insults an entire state of people claiming that there were Cheneys on both sides of his family and they aren't even from West Virginia. I swear I don't even know what to say on that one.
Alright enough of that moving on to things which concern the local area. Tell me how in the FEMA plans to reuse these asbestos filled trailers again?!?!!? After they promised they wouldn't because of the health concerns that come along with their use they have up and changed their minds again. Apparently, since the 2008 hurricane season is expected to be busier than normal they intend to use them for victims of disaster as long as they have the least amount of formaldehyde possible. Well I guess a little is better than a lot. This is going to be extra wrong of me, but is this some sort of plan to kill off black people in New Orleans? I mean I have heard about engineering crack and then HIV. I wonder if we can stir up some things in the earth to cause a hurricane and furthermore if we can cause said hurricane to happen, do we have to tell the people about it or do we just let them perish? Yep-one hell of a conundrum for the white man.

Hillary vs. Obama-Are you serious?

This has been one hell of an interesting day in the world of the Democratic National Party.

Everything from Barack resigning from his church to Florida and Michigan's delegates getting only .5 votes per delegate. Hillary is still about two hundred votes back and yet she refuses to just sit the hell down. Folks, I do not understand this. If I were losing that bad three days before the last primaries and would have to win absolutely all that to even have a slight change I would without a doubt give up. That's just me and everyone is not me.

Anyways on a lighter note. I finally got some things off my chest that I had been meaning to tell my boo. I mean he's sweeter than pie and he allows me to be myself, but I had something I had been holding back. He took it well and that's why I love him. He's amazing.

Past that, can someone please explain to me why George Bush keeps trying to endorse McCain? I mean really you're the worst damned president ever and yet you think we respect your opinion? Go throw another wedding or drink a beer and have some pretzels.

SATC-The Movie and Some Extras

Sex and The City Movie is FABULOUS. I recommend anyone who loves shoes and fashion to see it. Within the first scene I was in love with every pair of shoes I saw. I must caution it is not for the light of heart sexually. I saw a new position I wanna try, some breasts and a P.E.N.I.S! When do you ever see those in movies? Yep. Yessir. A P.e.n.i.s. So yeah, not for the kiddies. Anyways....moving on...it's been a long day and I am excited about coming back into the blogging world. Before I go to bed I wanna leave you with a few quick tidbits. First a YouTube vid I saw last night...it's cute a father/daughter dance from a wedding check it out:


All together now "awwwww" ;)

Secondly, I am trying a new shampoo and conditioner plus moisturizers. Palmer's Coconut. Smells good about $4 per item at Wal-Mart good summer scent!

Good night. Have a blessed weekend.

A Quick Recap

So this was my first attempt at blogging about anything since LiveJournal. I really thought I could keep up with it but then life proved too hectic. Just to catch things up a bit here's a quick recap of where I've been since 4/8.

-Finals
-Graduation (had family in town and it was wonderful for them to come and see my new home)
-New Love (amazing and we'll get back to that later)
-Looking for a job and place to live (if anyone has any ideas let me know)

So now I am just in New Orleans wrapping things up and trying to find ways to get on with my life. Don't get me wrong I enjoyed the hell out of my experience but I am too old for it now.

I had a wonderful time with the family in town but sometimes I felt a little smothered and a little looked over. But thank God in every one of those cases I had someone in my corner to tell me to breathe, calm down and it will be okay.

I have to say I am so grateful for that man. I don't think he'll ever know or understand just how much he does for me. It's not like he's doing it because he pities me, but he genuinely loves me and that makes it so easy to love him-which brings me to my next point. I am noticing now that when someone mistreats you, acts like you are their property instead of your own person get the hell away from them because they will drag you down and make you wish you could be anywhere doing anything other than having to deal with them and their crazy ass ways and ideas. Glad I got out. But there's one thing I have to note: I never would have had it not been for this police officer I know. She told me, "Get out or you might miss a good thing". I would have missed a fabulous thing fooling around with a piece of shit.

In other news can someone please explain why Hillary won't just drop out? I mean damned are you serious? Michigan and Florida really aren't going to give you anywhere close to the damned dear 300 votes you need to secure the nomination. I don't even think John McCain is worried about her, only Obama. I have to admit that as a black presidential candidate I am sort of scared of him, but I trust that he will be taken care of. Speaking of Obama....got to love Michelle, more on that tomorrow. ;)

Perfect Peace....getting there

Cold Water Blues

So I wake up this morning with a million things to do only to realize I have no hot water. Now, a lot of people may not know this but I really dig a hot, soapy shower or a steamy bubble bath. Yes, this is absolute relaxation for me. I love nothing more than water sliding down my skin with fragrant bubbles. But I digress, there was only cold water for me to bathe in, so I skipped it and went about my day without it until about 4. I have to say it can be kinda difficult living in New Orleans with such hot weather and no shower, but thanks to wipes I made it.

Other than that I had a fruitful day. I got a lot accomplished and I feel good about myself. :)

I am sexy.

That is all for now ;)

PP.

Monday, Monday

So today is going to be busier than I thought. I stayed in bed until the absolute last minute cause I didn't feel well. Anyways, now that I am up I realize I have a 4-7 page paper due before midnight, one to edit before tomorrow and some chapters that I need to read. I need to post on Blackboard, I need to update my resume. I want to relax. I want to sleep. I don't want to be sick. I want to frolic in the park. Now I think I really get my class that talks about woman-self and woman-being. My being is forced to do all this foolishness, while my self is chilling. I am starting to realize that I would like to live a life with a job, a husband and some kids. I think that would be ideal for me. I need to feel busy, obligated but not enslaved. Yep-that's me, I like to be busy and sort of tested just not stressed. I have good friends (except one or two toxic ones I might need to kick out and even that will come in time). I must say I miss the easy life of high school but mostly I think I just miss the people who helped me to grow into the woman I am today. Looking back on it all I realize that I was quiet, a non-fighter, and I did a whole lot of not standing up for myself. I let a lot of things slide. Now I am gonna tell you the truth. You're gonna hear in case you want to or not. It's not such a bad way to be. People are going to have to get that you have to show respect to other people. You can't just go around treating people any way you want.
Ok break time is over, so that's all for now. :)

PP

A Reflective Peace

So it's been almost four years since I started this whole college thing. I am going to be done soon and I think life after college is going to be very interesting. I am becoming very nervous and anxious about how life after college is going to work per se. I mean apartment, car, bills, more school, job, relationships, keeping up with friends. It's all too much for one person to take in all at one time. I think a lot of people think I am doing these things effortlessly, but wow, if you only knew. This is so not easy. It's like every time you think you've got it right there's another setback. There's never enough hours in the day to get things done. You're always stressed or tired and even when you're relaxing and trying to do nothing something always crosses your mind. Sometimes I don't know how I am going to make it, I just know I have God, a great family, wonderful friends and an amazing life that I am so grateful for. Anyways, I hope everyone has a good week.

As Gina would say,

Perfect Peace:)